One of the first questions many engaged couples ask once they have a wedding date is: “Do we really need to send save the dates?”
The short answer? No—you don’t have to. But for many couples, save the dates are one of the most helpful pieces of wedding stationery they can send.
As wedding planners, we see save the dates become especially valuable when couples are planning a destination wedding, a weekend-long celebration, a holiday weekend wedding, or a wedding with a large number of out-of-town guests. They give your guests an early heads-up and, just as importantly, give them time to make travel arrangements before your formal invitation arrives.
So, should you send save the dates? Here’s what we recommend considering before you add them to your wedding checklist.
What Is a Save the Date?
A save the date is an announcement sent before your formal wedding invitation to let guests know your wedding date and encourage them to reserve that date on their calendar.
Unlike a formal invitation, a save the date doesn't need to include all of your wedding details. At minimum, it typically includes:
Your names
Your wedding date
The general location or city
“Save the Date”
Your wedding website, if available
A note indicating that a formal invitation will follow
Your save the date is essentially the first official communication about your wedding. Think of it as a preview of what's to come rather than the complete invitation.
When Should You Send Save the Dates?
Timing is one of the biggest questions couples have—and there isn't one exact rule for every wedding.
For a Local Wedding
For a wedding where most guests live relatively close to the venue, sending save the dates approximately 6–8 months before the wedding is a good general guideline.
If your wedding is during a particularly busy time of year, however, sending them a little earlier can be helpful.
For a Destination Wedding
Planning a destination wedding or expecting many guests to travel?
Consider sending save the dates 8–12 months in advance.
Your guests may need to budget for airfare, arrange childcare, request vacation time, and book hotel accommodations. The more advance notice you can give them, the better.
For Holiday Weekend Weddings
If you're getting married over Memorial Day, Fourth of July, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, or another popular travel weekend, we recommend giving guests plenty of advance notice—even if your wedding isn't technically a destination wedding.
The same applies to weddings during particularly popular travel seasons.
Who Should Receive a Save the Date?
Here's an important wedding-planning rule:
Only send a save the date to someone who will definitely be invited to your wedding.
Once someone receives a save the date, they're going to reasonably assume a formal invitation is coming.
This means your save-the-date mailing list should be based on your actual guest list, not a preliminary list of people you're still debating.
If you're unsure whether someone will make the final cut, wait.
What About Plus-Ones?
You don't necessarily need to give every guest a plus-one simply because you're sending a save the date.
However, your save-the-date should reflect the invitation you ultimately plan to send. If a guest is being invited with a spouse or established partner, address the save the date accordingly.
For guests whose plus-one situation hasn't been finalized, it's best to resolve that before mailing the save the date rather than creating confusion later.
Do You Need to Have Your Venue Booked?
Yes—we strongly recommend it.
Before sending save the dates, you should have your:
Wedding date confirmed
Venue booked
Guest list reasonably established
Wedding location confirmed
You don't need to have every wedding detail figured out. Your menu, flowers, bridesmaid dresses, timeline, and even your wedding website can still be works in progress.
But your date and location need to be reliable.
Changing your wedding date after save the dates have been mailed can create a significant amount of confusion and expense for both you and your guests.
What Should You Put on Your Save the Date?
Keep it simple!
Your save the date is not your invitation. You don't need to include your ceremony time, reception information, dress code, RSVP instructions, or complete wedding weekend itinerary.
A traditional save the date might include:
Save the Date
Jessica & Michael
Saturday, September 12, 2027
Laguna Beach, California
Formal invitation to follow
Then include your wedding website if it's ready.
Your website can provide the additional information guests may need, including hotel recommendations, transportation information, your wedding weekend schedule, registry details, and travel tips.
Should You Include Your Wedding Website?
Absolutely!
If you have your wedding website ready, your save the date is an excellent place to share it.
This is especially helpful for weddings with out-of-town guests. Instead of trying to squeeze hotel information, transportation details, and travel recommendations onto a small card, simply direct guests to your website.
Just make sure the website is actually ready before printing the URL.
At a minimum, we'd recommend having your date, location, and basic travel information available before your save the dates arrive in guests' mailboxes.
Do Save the Dates Need to Match Your Wedding Invitations?
Not at all!
Your save the date can coordinate with your wedding stationery without being an exact match.
Some couples use their engagement photos, a beautiful illustration of their venue, custom artwork, or a design that simply hints at their wedding color palette.
Think of it as the opening chapter of your wedding stationery story.
For example:
A coastal wedding might use soft blues and ocean-inspired photography.
A garden wedding might incorporate botanical artwork.
A black-tie wedding might lean into elegant typography and sophisticated neutrals.
A colorful summer wedding might feature bold florals and vibrant colors.
Your save the date is an opportunity to let your personality come through.
Digital or Printed Save the Dates: Which Is Better?
This really comes down to your priorities.
Printed Save the Dates
Printed save the dates are a wonderful choice if you love beautiful paper goods and want to create a tangible keepsake.
They're especially appropriate for a formal wedding where stationery is an important part of the overall guest experience.
Keep in mind that you'll need to budget for design, printing, envelopes, addressing, and postage.
Digital Save the Dates
Digital save the dates can be an excellent option for couples who want to save money, simplify the process, or communicate quickly with guests.
They're also convenient if your wedding website is already established.
Digital doesn't have to mean boring. There are plenty of beautifully designed digital options that can feel polished and intentional.
A Hybrid Approach
Some couples choose to send printed save the dates to immediate family and VIP guests while using digital communication for other guests.
If you go this route, just make sure your communication is consistent and that every guest receives the same essential information.
Do Save the Dates Actually Matter for a Local Wedding?
This is where your guest list matters most.
If almost everyone on your guest list lives within driving distance of your venue and your wedding isn't during a busy travel period, you may be perfectly fine skipping save the dates.
But if you have guests traveling from different states—or even different parts of California—they can be extremely helpful.
We especially recommend them if your wedding is in a destination such as Laguna Beach, Newport Beach, Santa Barbara, Napa, Palm Springs, or another popular Southern California wedding destination where guests may want to turn your wedding into a weekend getaway.
What If You Have a Short Engagement?
Don't panic!
If you're planning your wedding in six months or less, you don't necessarily need to squeeze save the dates into an already-fast planning timeline.
Instead, you can personally let important guests know the date and then send your formal invitations according to your abbreviated timeline.
In other words: don't send a save the date simply because you think you're supposed to.
Your wedding communication should serve your guests—not create another task on your already very long wedding checklist.
Save the Date Mistakes to Avoid
After helping couples plan hundreds of weddings, here are a few mistakes we recommend avoiding:
1. Sending Them Before Your Date Is Firm
Don't rush. Your wedding date should be officially confirmed before anything goes into the mail.
2. Sending Them to Your “Maybe” List
This is a big one.
Don't use save the dates as a way to test your guest list. If they're receiving one, they should be invited.
3. Including Too Much Information
Your save the date doesn't need to become a mini wedding invitation.
Keep it simple and direct guests to your wedding website for additional information.
4. Forgetting About Travel Guests
If you have guests flying or driving significant distances, give them enough time to make arrangements.
5. Waiting Until the Last Minute
The whole purpose of a save the date is advance notice. Don't wait until three months before the wedding and expect it to provide much benefit.
So… Should You Send Save the Dates?
Our answer as wedding planners?
For many couples, yes—but they're not mandatory.
Save the dates are especially worthwhile if you're planning a destination wedding, have lots of out-of-town guests, are getting married over